Back in the land of the living

And the sun will come back again tomorrow

If you leave and take your sorrow

Stand down at sundown, get yourself gone

From now on

-Matt Mays + El Torpedo, Stand Down at Sundown

No, the monster isn't completely gone, but I feel much better today.

Just like I don't understand why it came, I don't understand why it left either. It's not like anything good has happened in the last 24 hours that would pull me out of the dumps. 

It gradually got better over the last few days - Tuesday, when it started, was a 3 at best on the Sickter scale, whereas yesterday was probably a 5 - and today I don't feel that cloud hanging over me anymore.

I'm not saying I feel great or anything, but I rarely do, so I consider this a victory.

I still have my moments though... last night during the Bruins game, while walking through the concourse to get to the bathroom, I had an anxiety attack like you wouldn't believe. I got claustrophobic in the middle of all those people - and believe me, I'm not claustrophobic - and it felt like my chest was going to explode if I didn't get out of there. By the time I got to the bathroom I was out of breath.

All week I was feeling overwhelmed by the thought of covering the United Way Telethon this weekend - a big event, the kind of thing I'd never covered before - and I was convinced I was going to do a terrible job. But I was just over there for a couple hours and it was fine.

I want to say thanks to my friends, family and co-workers for their support over the last few days... this is an illness that's impossible to understand if you haven't been through it and yet these people gave me their unconditional support. It helped more than you know.